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I remember when I did my baptism interview, the last question I was asked was, "If this was your last day on Earth, where will you end up?" I also remember my questionable answer, "Heaven?" and the convicted answer my Pastor encouraged me to give, "Heaven." The skepticallity [NOT A WORD, BUT NOW IS 'CAUSE I'M AWESOME] I had at that point didn't bother me until today. Obviously I know I do believe in Jesus and that I am a follower, but I can't help at points think I was a fan of him.
"Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, characterful; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." [Romans 5:3-5]
Today, God literally gave me a wake-up call. I got a call bright and early [for a Saturday!] at 9:38AM and my friend said, "Hey. I had a nightmare about you and I couldn't stop thinking about it afterwards. I prayed the entire morning until I couldn't take it anymore and called you. Can we pray?" Ummm...Woah. We prayed and after that I was so overwhelmed that I poured out everything; how March was the worst month for me, my lost friendship with my greatest friend, being sick, TC, car accidents, school, yearbook, university, and so much more. After everything I said, after listening to me rant and rant and rant, he said one thing, "I know. I already knew all this." My head was literally buzzing and I didn't understand. He told me that his entire nightmare was basically a replay of everything I told him.
"For if, when we were God's enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life!" [Romans 5:10]
Throughout this month, I can honestly, and not proudly, say that I have been far from God. And he knew. My friend knew. He suggested I spend an hour praying with God [truthfully, I only prayed for 25 minutes, but at that point, I poured out everything already] and like I said in the video I sent to encourage him and his fellowship, "have a heart to heart with God." He told me that God was already with me this entire time; I just didn't see. And he also jokingly [but seriously] told me God spoiled me a lot. He even sent this vision[?] to him to just bug him to the point where he had to talk to me, and God knew I would listen if it was from this friend.
Even when I rejected and shunned God, thinking I would be fine this month if I kept everyone at arm's length, he still loves me. Even before I knew him, he still loves me. Even before I was born, he still loves me. And he still loves me despite the fact this month was horrible, and I felt like no one knew me; he did. He stated in this passage that rarely people would did for a righteous man, a good man maybe, but an enemy? He did, and at the end of the day, when we die, where would we go?
We can prepare all we want. We prepare for university by getting everything ready, buying textbooks and learning about the new clubs we can join to meet new people. We prepare for a party by buying the food, drinks and setting up the PS3 or Wii. We prepare for exams by studying, making notes and reviewing everything we learned in the past semester or year. Yet at the end of the day, which preparations really matter?
The one for Heaven.
This entire month, I can say I wasn't at prepared at all. But after that reconciliation I had with God, after that prayer and confession and heart to heart, I'm ready.
When you die, where will you go?
Are you prepared?
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If death comes today, will you be prepared to meet God?
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