illusions.

"personality is a dangerous illusion."

That line struck me today when I was sitting in the auditorium, watching the AY Drama 12 students take the stage with absurd, intriguing and brilliant theatre. The context of the line came from one of the absurd pieces where it was said by the priest (i think) where he is a representative of the church in the eyes of society, but within the play, he had hidden secrets, doing drugs and only putting out that proper image when in the light.

This bugs me a lot, when we as Christians, representatives are Christ are two-faced. Yes, i understand that we are not perfect, but its the worst when we know of it yet we choose to continue to still do it. By doing so, we smear the name of Christ. Christ was known as love, accepting, non-judgemental, and wise. He was known for much more than that, and we have to continue to live that out. We are called to be light of the world, and the way of Christ is not the ways of this world. By following him and living out a life glorifying Him, we will stand out, and if the people around you can't see that in you, there's a problem.

What bothers me the most is that when we misrepresent Christ, it can easily hinder those around you from coming to hear this great news. Seeing and thinking, "oh there's nothing special about them, they do exactly what we do", there's no reason for them to be interested why you live how you live. When representing Christ, we don't have to be all verbal, and voice everything out, i've learnt that actions speak equally if not louder.

We're not perfect, and I'm not saying I'm the perfect example and representative either, but as long as try, we understand, we learn and we execute, then God will be pleased. Let him use you as his instrument to fulfill his will and your purpose.

²⁰ We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God.

2 Corinthians 5:20

Renewal.

I've been picked up. Yes the past few days have been dark, and I was slipping up in the quicksand of sin, but i was renewed today. It all sparked from a friend who emailed me, with comfort, encouragement and support. She sent me Psalm 42 which i found extremely comforting, and when i read it in her email, i was moved, i felt something inside of me. I know for a fact that God placed her in my life and he was speaking to me through her. I cannot thank her or my God enough for that. After getting her message, i was moved to dive into his Word and i tried something new. I walked out to the park and spent a good hour in his Word, in worship and in prayer. During that time I went through three chapters of Psalms. Psalm 37, Psalm 40 andPsalm 42.

Going through the passages, i found comfort and peace in it. I couldnt exactly pinpoint what it was, but there were a few verses that stood out to me.

Psalm 37:23-24

^{23 23} The LORD directs the steps of the godly.
He delights in every detail of their lives.
²⁴ Though they stumble, they will never fall,
for the LORD holds them by the hand.

We will all stumble, in sin, falling short of God's glory, but with his almighty hand and love, he will make sure we stand back up and continue to walk by him. He's holding onto our hand, making sure we're safe and are not left behind. Its a great feeling knowing that someone is specifically watching out for you,

Psalm 37:39-40

³⁹ The LORD rescues the godly;
he is their fortress in times of trouble.
⁴⁰ The LORD helps them,
rescuing them from the wicked.
He saves them,
and they find shelter in him.

My fortress in times of trouble is my God. He will keep me still, calm my heart and give me peace in times of distress, and mess. He is the rock I hold onto. He rescues me from the wicked and shelters me under his loving and caring arms.

Psalm 40:2-3

² He lifted me out of the pit of despair,
out of the mud and the mire.
He set my feet on solid ground
and steadied me as I walked along.
³ He has given me a new song to sing,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see what he has done and be amazed.
They will put their trust in the LORD.

Psalm 40 came from my devotional, about how God lifts us out of trouble and that's exactly how i felt today. He's given me a new life, he has renewed me and given me a new slate. He's given me a new song, literally! I found this song after we sang it at church the other day, "You Alone Can Rescue" by Matt Redman. What a great reminder to how only God alone will sustain and lift us out of all darkness. The last part of verse 3 i think sums up evangelism. As Christians, we are Christ representatives and through our lives, hopefully many will see what God has done and will place their trust in the Lord as well. I myself know that there are a few people that look up to me, and it only motivates me more to set and be that example to not lead others astray.

Psalm 40:11-12

¹¹ LORD, don’t hold back your tender mercies from me.
Let your unfailing love and faithfulness always protect me.
¹² For troubles surround me—
too many to count!
My sins pile up so high
I can’t see my way out.
They outnumber the hairs on my head.
I have lost all courage.

"I have lost all courage." This is on the NLT version, it didnt show up on my bible during my reading today. Thats exactly how i felt this week. Like all was lost, nothing could fix this, that "my sins were piled up so high", having "troubles surround me", but God is good and will always protect me.

Psalm 42:1-3

¹ As the deer longs for streams of water,
so I long for you, O God.
² I thirst for God, the living God.
When can I go and stand before him?
³ Day and night I have only tears for food,
while my enemies continually taunt me, saying,
“Where is this God of yours?”

This was the passage my friend sent me. Throughout the entire passage, one line was repeated many many times, "Where is your God?". In times of trouble, we may ask that, others may ask us that. Where is your God? If you're Christian and you believe in this great God, where is he when you're struggling and are trudging through? The answer? Right next to me. There are times where he feels distant, and im sure thats exactly what i felt this week, but I think that its during these times where the true test of faith comes into play. When he feels distant (but really isnt), will you fall away from him? Its through these times you learn and you are strengthened. It is truly when we go to seek Christ is when we find true joy and peace in the love of our Father.

Ezekiel 37:23

²³ They will never again pollute themselves with their idols and vile images and rebellion, for I will save them from their sinful backsliding. I will cleanse them. Then they will truly be my people, and I will be their God.

This was the theme verse for TC (Teens Conference) this year. I find it really powerful. We will NEVER pollute ourselves of sin, of doubt, of guilt, of temptation, of pain, of struggle, of trouble, with our own thoughts, of sin, of pride, of idols, of sexual immorality, because God WILL save us. We are CLEANSED. This is who we have to be as a follower of God.

I feel renewed.

I feel risen.

What else can I say but PTL.

verse of the day: Psalm 42:8

⁸ But each day the LORD pours his unfailing love upon me,
and through each night I sing his songs,
praying to God who gives me life.

Prove It!

Sunday School this week was a challenge. I think as Christians, there are many things we tend to avoid, but are yet so essential to our faith. Evangelism, standing up for our faith. As Christians, can we explain why we believe? This is what our teacher challenged us with. If you came across this question/statement, how would you answer it?

Prove That God Exists.

I remember when he asked us that question, as well as "is there a God", i cringed, i really didnt want to answer it. I felt so inable to answer it, i didnt feel equipped enough to answer it, to figure out all the facts, to disprove the big bang theory, or whatever other scientific facts, but the truth is we have to face this question. The world has this mindset that things arent true unless proven, thats what science is all about! But how do we prove something we cant see? How are we to answer this if it comes along our way one day? Think about it.

We went around the room sharing our ideas, and a university student was the person we were trying to convince, and many people gave interesting things that i was most interested to hear.

SCIENCE FACTS:

- If it was tilted an angle too much to the left or to the right, we would either burn or freeze.

- Scientists talk about how life was formed from amoebas to sea creatures to land creature, but how do you go from absolutely NOTHING to something without a greater and stronger force?

- Big bang theory, that planets are red shifted, that they are moving away, therefore at one point in time, they must have been close together, but what gave it that umph of energy to create that bang?

OTHER FACTS:

- there has to be a greater purpose in life, why are we living, without God, there is no true purpose on earth

- the bible has been sustained for so long, its almost impossible. If someone didnt believe then they could have destroyed and burned it, and yet it has been passed on and is still living and breathing for thousands of years

These were all things people shared and we discussed, are they strong, are they convincing, that's up to you.

Afterwards, the university student pointed out two answers she liked.

First, she said the answer that "if we could prove that God existed, then we wouldn't have a choice to believe or not". That is very true, if God was proven, everyone would realize the truth and turn to him right? That was very thought provoking for me.

Second, which i think i've talked about previously somewhere, is the comparison between other religions. That if you look at many other religions, they are all self-oriented, doing deeds to gain something, may it be self-fulfilment, or happiness. But if you look at Christianity, its the other way around, we have all be presented with the gift of the gospel and eternal life, its up to us to accept that gift or not. And also, you see that Christianity is the only faith that is inviting and welcoming. You dont see Buddhism holding events inviting people to be Buddhist as well. We are Christians are sharing and want others to hear the good news as well.

After all the talk, we came to a final conclusion, that i think is pretty solid. The best proof for this answer is you. The Christians. The Christ-followers. Are your deeds and your words proclaiming and glorifying Christ? If you are, others will see God working in you and through and that is the greatest proof that he lives, he reigns, and that he is the way, the truth and the life.

Are YOU the living proof to answer this question?