numbered.

I am continually thinking about this and realizing this, that everything is numbered, and once there were firsts, but now comes lasts. From prom, to last SNA, to last worship practices, numbered nights in that bed, numbered days before university, everything is slowly wrapping up.

I can't take it. Thinking about it recently, i feel like everything is picking up too, but at this late late hour. Im finally starting to truly enjoy myself, have fun, feeling welcomed and accepted, but May 26th of my final year? Any later? Just being around the grade 10s today at AGAPE was exhilarating, they are full of energy and potential, they're kind, sweet, funny, and fun, and it hurts thinking about their absence next year.

I feel like a whirlwind is about to pick up, i don't know whats going to happen, who I'm going to lose, who I'm going to keep, what God is trying to teach me, or what the final results will be. Im scared, I'm nervous, I'm not ready, but putting faith in God.

I think this upcoming transition between high school and university will be another test, just like SNA and ACUPE, another lesson to put my faith in Christ. He knows best. Although everything is numbered, he's here for me and with me at all times.

⁷ 

Since no one knows the future,    who can tell someone else what is to come?

Ecclesiastes 8:7 

May His Will Be Done.

Some things just don't work out. God has a plan for each and every one of us. Lately i've been learning and thinking about giving up my life to Him. Im sure each of us have some things in our life that we are still holding onto, unable to let go of. May it be something personal, a secret, or a person, a relationship, we hate not having control of things. I know when i plan and organize things, things must always be under control or else it just doesn't work out for me.

There are some things we can't control. For instance, university acceptances. We can work hard, and get those marks in as high as we can, but the decision the university makes are completely out of our control. I think that its in these times where we have to learn to let go, and give it to God to handle. He is greater, he has a paved road for us, its up to us to focus on that road, or for us to be curious on things that are off the path.

Let His will be done. Humble yourself, and let Him use you has his instrument to do good, to spread his love. He knows whats best for you, he's always looking out for you, he won't leave you behind or leave you trapped, he only wants whats good for you. That is only if you let him.

⁸ It is better to take refuge in the Lord     than to trust in humans.

Psalm 118:8 

Just Leave.

I've realized that i talk a lot about friends. I think it's just because they are the ones who keep me going (besides my family). I was talking to one of my closest friends about leaving to university.

Who knows what will happen. Meeting new people, starting fresh, going into a new environment, attending new classes, and simply being overloaded with work. After saying all this to him i realized i might actually lose him as a friend. He'll get caught up in all the work and stress and simply forget about me. He told me that it's part of growing up, i gotta spend the last moments i have with them and treasure them. and he said he'll try his best to keep in contact.

At that moment i realized that it's all becoming reality. In less than 6 months most of my close friends will be leaving for university. I honestly don't know what I'm going to do when they're gone. Suck it up and move on.

If i don't want to regret anything i have to treasure the moments i have with them.

nothing to something.

Ever since planning SNA this year for December, the message we were conveying really stuck in my head. The overarching message was that everything is meaningless. Everything fades, from relationships to materialistic things, that all things will fail us and that we are putting our hope in the wrong things. We should put our faith and hope in Lord Jesus Christ because he lives, and he's promised to love us back, unconditionally and eternally. We should put our hope in something worth putting our hope into. Knowing God will never fail and will never fade assures us that this is the right choice.

After thinking that through, i keep thinking, why are we doing this then? Whats the point, of getting these academics, going to university, getting that degree that'll fade, working to have a career, why can't we just give up on this?

I said that during our devotions last night at AGAPE and my counsellor gave me an answer that really got me thinking and really answered my question. He started with a story. Saying that one time on the street a friend said to another, "how can i help this homeless man?", and the friend responded with nothing at the moment, but you can work hard, study hard until you have a position of influence to then help this man.

I think this whole time i've just been thinking about myself. Where does all this take me, how will it benefit me. But from what i got out of it, its completely different. God gave us talents and gifts and passions, for instance, mine is Wildlife Biology, and he's also given us opportunities and privileges, if you can read this, you have internet, and if you're going to university, you are a part of 2% of the richest people in the world. God's granted us education, and its with this, the passion, the opportunities for us to work hard to help others. Not so you can get a good job a good pay a good car and a good house, but to be in a position of influence to help others.

¹¹For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Jeremiah 29:11

Prof vs. Student

This was something interesting i saw on my Facebook newsfeed, take some time to read it.

---

Professor : You are a Christian, aren’t you, son ?

Student : Yes, sir.

Professor: So, you believe in GOD ?

Student : Absolutely, sir.

Professor : Is GOD good ?

Student : Sure.

Professor: Is GOD all powerful ?

Student : Yes.

Professor: My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to GOD to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But GOD didn’t. How is this GOD good then? Hmm?

(Student was silent.)

Professor: You can’t answer, can you ? Let’s start again, young fella. Is GOD good?

Student : Yes.

Professor: Is satan good ?

Student : No.

Professor: Where does satan come from ?

Student : From … GOD …

Professor: That’s right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?

Student : Yes.

Professor: Evil is everywhere, isn’t it ? And GOD did make everything. Correct?

Student : Yes.

Professor: So who created evil ?

(Student did not answer.)

Professor: Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don’t they?

Student : Yes, sir.

Professor: So, who created them ?

(Student had no answer.)

Professor: Science says you have 5 Senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son, have you ever seen GOD?

Student : No, sir.

Professor: Tell us if you have ever heard your GOD?

Student : No , sir.

Professor: Have you ever felt your GOD, tasted your GOD, smelt your GOD? Have you ever had any sensory perception of GOD for that matter?

Student : No, sir. I’m afraid I haven’t.

Professor: Yet you still believe in Him?

Student : Yes.

Professor : According to Empirical, Testable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says your GOD doesn’t exist. What do you say to that, son?

Student : Nothing. I only have my faith.

Professor: Yes, faith. And that is the problem Science has.

Student : Professor, is there such a thing as heat?

Professor: Yes.

Student : And is there such a thing as cold?

Professor: Yes.

Student : No, sir. There isn’t.

(The lecture theatre became very quiet with this turn of events.)

Student : Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don’t have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can’t go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.

(There was pin-drop silence in the lecture theater.)

Student : What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?

Professor: Yes. What is night if there isn’t darkness?

Student : You’re wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright light, flashing light. But if you have no light constantly, you have nothing and its called darkness, isn’t it? In reality, darkness isn’t. If it is, were you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn’t you?

Professor: So what is the point you are making, young man ?

Student : Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.

Professor: Flawed ? Can you explain how?

Student : Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good GOD and a bad GOD. You are viewing the concept of GOD as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can’t even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing.

Death is not the opposite of life: just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor, do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?

Professor: If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, yes, of course, I do.

Student : Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?

(The Professor shook his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument was going.)

Student : Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor. Are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a scientist but a preacher?

(The class was in uproar.)

Student : Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor’s brain?

(The class broke out into laughter. )

Student : Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor’s brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established Rules of Empirical, Stable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?

(The room was silent. The Professor stared at the student, his face unfathomable.)

Professor: I guess you’ll have to take them on faith, son.

Student : That is it sir … Exactly ! The link between man & GOD is FAITH. That is all that keeps things alive and moving.

P.S.

I believe you have enjoyed the conversation. And if so, you’ll probably want your friends / colleagues to enjoy the same, won’t you?

Forward this to increase their knowledge … or FAITH.

By the way, that student was EINSTEIN. (not so sure about that end bit)

---

Interesting no? thoughts?

⁷ For we live by faith, not by sight.

2 Corinthians 5:7

Visits.

So today my friend came over to chill for a few minutes unsuspectingly.

He asked me if i was home and the next thing you know, he's sitting on my bed.

Today was such a tiring day that i needed a nap in order to get my work done. Did i get this nap? Nope! I'd have to say that seeing my friend's face totally made my day. This one simple person can do so much. Also, i have to say that I think i've been taking this friend for granted. I went to him whenever i needed help and that was the only time when i would initiate a conversation. Last night, i talked to him bout stuff and it made me realize that he's leaving to go to university so soon so i must take the opportunity to spend more time with him. I learned that we should never take friends for granted. (this post is similar to the one that i did before but in a more positive way)

One simple visit from a friend can make someone's day.

Courses.

All these courses to pick from. This all determines my future. It's just so scary to think about what university I'll get into, how am i going to apply, what if i get into something i don't like. All these thoughts go through my head. I think about whether or not it's pleasing to God, if this future job will make my parents proud, and whether or not i'll like it.

I always think about whether or not it's the perfect plan for me. To be honest, i've been striving to be come a teacher but, my dad told me that i should be a computer engineer. I took that to consideration for about a year (a while ago) but now, i realized that i truly have a passion for kids.

Every time i think about course selections, i feel like i block God out of my sight. I never really thought of his plans for me. After praying with my mom, i realized that his plans are perfect whether we like it or not. The courses we pick may have a reason and some may not but in the end, it's all perfectly planned out by God.

His plans are perfect for you and don't ever forget that.

The Unknown.

It was foggy today, and it just got worse and worse throughout the day. On the way back from dinner, we could barely see what was ahead of us. I remember on the way back, I thought that we passed our street, but I was mistaken. Thinking about what to talk about today, i realized that this is exactly what life is like. Its blurry, and our future is unpredictable. You dont know if you a deer will come out from the side, if you're on the oncoming lane, or if you're reaching a dead end. We can only follow the 5m road ahead of us that we can actually see. Many times, we want to have complete control of our lives, where we want to live, the ideal family, the perfect career, but truthfully, there are things that are just out of our control. For instance, university, you dont know where you are going to go, all you can do is do the best you can in school and hope you get into the program you want. Marriage, how do you control meeting the perfect spouse?

Its all in God's time. Life with or without God is a blurry road. Life without is complete fog and you're just entrusting yourself, as well as the road on what is right. The road can represent the world and its standards, driving you towards a different destination. Where as with God, we have someone greater looking out for us. God will be that extra GPS you have in the car, which directs the route from satellite, much higher above us that can see all the routes, all the dead ends, and now, even which roads are more congested with traffic! If you were the driver, would you trust yourself based on what you know? or will trust the GPS?

The unknown is often a fear for many people. We all hate not knowing what is coming up and what's next. I know that I myself get paranoid when im not prepared or ready for a presentation or anything. Will you learn to trust our greater God?

4 out of 5.

"dont get swept away by the waves of temptation"

On Sunday we went to sunday school class, as always, and the overall theme/lesson was campus life, first year, and what we'd encounter. And we talked a LOT about drinking, partying, priorities, and temptations.

I dont know what it was, whether if it was the video, how they created it, the music, the stories, but a lot of it was about drinking, and it made it all seem really real. It made it seem like, that was the biggest thing we'll encounter, and that thats all that campus life is about. Im hoping its not, but we'll find out.

There were stories from going to the hospital, and getting sexually assaulted, and it was just all in my face. But then the next bit was what hit me the most.

"4 out of 5 Christians fall away from Christ when they head to University."

I've heard this several times, but i guess seeing it, and the fact that i was sitting in a room filled with graduates that are in groups of fives. It was all becoming a reality. Sitting in my group, Denton, Bryan, Jasper, Donald, Adrienne. Thats 5. And 4 of them are going to leave Christ? Thats a scary thought.

Talking about alcohol and then people falling away, one person popped into my mind. And worries started to pour in. I was scared he'd be a easy snab by Satan and i cant afford to lose him, or anyone from AGAPE for that matter. I think his faith still isnt strong, he's experimented with alcohol, and i feel like everything we talked about in class was a screaming invitation from the Devil. I can only hope and pray that he wont fall away. There's no way i can check up on him, and i just feel kinda useless and that i cant do anything to help him out. I know to leave it up to God, but i pray and hope i can do everything i can, now and later to make sure it doesnt happen.

4 out of 5 people will fall away from Christ.

Accountability is so important.

Check up on your friends and keep them close.

Find a fellowship ASAP when you get to campus.